I guess when you're a new blogger, blogging is on your mind a lot. When I'm off the computer, more often than not I have thoughts chasing themselves around in my head that would make superb post material. Every so often I jot down some keywords onto post-it notes or scrap paper so I won't forget these epiphanies that so oftenly frequent my overbusy mind... I now have quite a list of promising post material, so now the only valid excuse I have for not posting is having no access to a computer.
So now on to the point.
Ever since my first post, I was wondering about the purpose of a blog. Some use it to let off excess steam, others to solicit advice, some others as a discussion or debate forum, still others to rant or complain anonymously...and I suppose we all have some measure of all of those in our respective reasons for blogging. I have noticed, though, that different blogs project different "auras" (I wish there was a better description for it than that...) Some blogs are light and airy, commenting on mundane life happenings and random thoughts that occur to the blogger, others are heavy in content, delving into the intricacies of life and philosophy, but I think most are some kind of medium between those two extremes. I'm not entirely sure I know how I want my own blog's aura to project, but I think I've come to the conclusion as to why I've started one of my own...
To most of the people with whom I come into contact on a general day, I look like a happy, quirky, amiable, funny, energized person. Which I am; I'm not one who puts on a mask to hide some terrible, dark, depressing story underneath a pleasant exterior. But, like most complexly human individuals, I do have a side I generally don't show to people unless I have reason to believe that they will understand it, and thus I will cover that side up with a carefree, untroubled facade.
So now I will acquaint you with my other side. Cloaked by my screen, keyboard, and alias, I feel comfortable showing you the "other real me" with the hopes that you will understand me, validate me, and through the give and take on this blog, help me improve myself and learn the things I should be learning...
Here goes...
Behind the uncomplicated, happy-go-lucky, carefree face I wear, I am an intensely intense person. Nobody who knows me just stam will ever believe how painfully emotional I am, how complex and confusing my thought processes are, how turbulent and passionate and emotionally complicated my sensitive inner life really is. And since I'm not willing to share all that with most people, all the emotions and confusion and turbulence stay bottled up within me unless I find someone I can share my thoughts with. (I've actually found that just talking about what's on my mind can help me feel better, even if the person listening has no clue what I'm trying to say...which happens often...) I hope that this blog of mine will allow me to do what I find so hard to do on a regular basis; to let me talk the intensity out. And I hope to get feedback from people who identify with me as well...
I'm sure that many of you have started blogs for quite the same reason, (except in my case I don't know if I knew that's what I really wanted when I started mine...) and so you probably know just what I'm talking about. (It actually just occurred to me that perhaps everyone is just like me and I'm not different from anyone else at all...in which case this whole post is quite pointless...or that nobody understands me at all and I'm just spewing incomprehensible gibberish...but...until I get some feedback I shouldn't think like this...)
I hope I'm making sense in my ramblings here.
I can't even remember why I decided to post this in the first place...Maybe to better acquaint myself to all of you. Or maybe to get some feedback about something I find so hard to understand by myself....
But I think I know...I think I posted to siphon off some of that intensity. And to see if this blog is a good place for posts of this kind.
Feel free to comment about what you think. I'm open to discussions, empathy, personal self-disclosure, and ideas about how I can make this blog a better forum for myself and for everyone else visiting.
Now go and have yourselves a great day, everyone!
So now on to the point.
Ever since my first post, I was wondering about the purpose of a blog. Some use it to let off excess steam, others to solicit advice, some others as a discussion or debate forum, still others to rant or complain anonymously...and I suppose we all have some measure of all of those in our respective reasons for blogging. I have noticed, though, that different blogs project different "auras" (I wish there was a better description for it than that...) Some blogs are light and airy, commenting on mundane life happenings and random thoughts that occur to the blogger, others are heavy in content, delving into the intricacies of life and philosophy, but I think most are some kind of medium between those two extremes. I'm not entirely sure I know how I want my own blog's aura to project, but I think I've come to the conclusion as to why I've started one of my own...
To most of the people with whom I come into contact on a general day, I look like a happy, quirky, amiable, funny, energized person. Which I am; I'm not one who puts on a mask to hide some terrible, dark, depressing story underneath a pleasant exterior. But, like most complexly human individuals, I do have a side I generally don't show to people unless I have reason to believe that they will understand it, and thus I will cover that side up with a carefree, untroubled facade.
So now I will acquaint you with my other side. Cloaked by my screen, keyboard, and alias, I feel comfortable showing you the "other real me" with the hopes that you will understand me, validate me, and through the give and take on this blog, help me improve myself and learn the things I should be learning...
Here goes...
Behind the uncomplicated, happy-go-lucky, carefree face I wear, I am an intensely intense person. Nobody who knows me just stam will ever believe how painfully emotional I am, how complex and confusing my thought processes are, how turbulent and passionate and emotionally complicated my sensitive inner life really is. And since I'm not willing to share all that with most people, all the emotions and confusion and turbulence stay bottled up within me unless I find someone I can share my thoughts with. (I've actually found that just talking about what's on my mind can help me feel better, even if the person listening has no clue what I'm trying to say...which happens often...) I hope that this blog of mine will allow me to do what I find so hard to do on a regular basis; to let me talk the intensity out. And I hope to get feedback from people who identify with me as well...
I'm sure that many of you have started blogs for quite the same reason, (except in my case I don't know if I knew that's what I really wanted when I started mine...) and so you probably know just what I'm talking about. (It actually just occurred to me that perhaps everyone is just like me and I'm not different from anyone else at all...in which case this whole post is quite pointless...or that nobody understands me at all and I'm just spewing incomprehensible gibberish...but...until I get some feedback I shouldn't think like this...)
I hope I'm making sense in my ramblings here.
I can't even remember why I decided to post this in the first place...Maybe to better acquaint myself to all of you. Or maybe to get some feedback about something I find so hard to understand by myself....
But I think I know...I think I posted to siphon off some of that intensity. And to see if this blog is a good place for posts of this kind.
Feel free to comment about what you think. I'm open to discussions, empathy, personal self-disclosure, and ideas about how I can make this blog a better forum for myself and for everyone else visiting.
Now go and have yourselves a great day, everyone!
18 comments:
I think we have a very similar approach to our blogs, except that I think I wear my emotions a little closer to the surface and so often, posting is not really a matter of me letting the world know something new as it is for me to organize my thoughts and put them in some coherent form. Feel free to use your blog to discuss/verbalize/rant about/muse over whatever you want; it's yours, after all!
This post isn't pointless at all - it's for *you* to clarify why you're writing, and for us as an audience to understand your motivation. I've met people through blogging who help me to sort through my thoughts better, and sometimes I even point certain friends towards my blog so that they can see what I'm trying to tell them even if I can't articulate it easily out loud.
I can remember a few intense periods of time when I was really struggling to define issues for myself and to figure out what to think (and it's almost always ongoing). Knowing that I had my blog to write things down and muse over was comforting; whether or not I actually decided to use it all the time is another story.
Anyway, the short version of this comment is: it's your blog for you to use how you want! I look forward to reading your blog - I can identify with a lot of what you've written here, and so I'm interested to see where your thoughts take you. :)
I don't know if everyone's just like you. In fact, there's probably noone just like you, to be cliche about it.
But I would suspect that there are those who see eyond your happy go lucky facade to the depth within. It's nearly impossible to seem shallow all the time when you're not.
And you sure are NOT.
Thanks for the second intro, and i'm truly looking forward to getting to know you.
Apple--
Yup, I guess it is mine :-)
...But as important to me as the actual posting is, the comments are, too. I need to hear that feedback, critique, others' thoughts, to know I'm understood and heard. Cuz what good would a blog be without comments?
As for where my thoughts will take me...Now that's another postworthy topic :-)
Dreamer--
You're right about [observant] people seeing past a facade, but one thing I didn't say is shallow. Shallow is the last thing people see on me. (B"H!!) It's almost a shitta by me...
I think you have a good idea for your blog and hopefully it will be helpful to you and others
I can only speak for myself, of course, but I think you've just described most of us. :-)
(In some sense, I mean -- of course we don't all have the same personality, but I'm referring to the idea of showing different facets through our blogs.)
Although I've been getting to know you for the past few months, it is nice to have this extra window into your soul. I think it is good for you to have the outlet to be able to share your thoughts and emotions and talk it out with all of us. I think a lot of us feel similarly to you and have the same sort of motivations for blogging. Perhaps it will be good for you to know you're not so alone, after all...
what apple said in the first paragraph. I also feel intensly about almost everything with very few people who will listen and understand in my immediate circle, but i also wear it on my sleeve so my blog allows me to organize and discuss these thought/questions/feelings with others.
I'm also a new blogger, and i find myself thinking about new posts a lot also, but i was going to say more about that in a post of my own. You said it very well, though so i'm reconsidering. Just the other night, i got out of bed at least twice to write down the post ideas swirling through my head. i think the ability to finally express and share in a "safe" forum is intoxicating to a large extent. i've really enjoyed and gained from your posts till now, and i can't wait to see what else you have to share:)
I kind of know what you mean - I can get very morose, but try not to. By blogging I guess I'm trying to sublimate my frustration into something wry, ironic, and humorous for people who feel the same way as me. It seems to work. :-)
So do whatever works for you! If we don't like it, that's our tough. Don't feel beholden to your audience.
I guess when you're a new blogger, blogging is on your mind a lot.
...even when you're NOT new... :)
Firstly - your blog, you do and write as you please!
More importantly:
I think that both are true - you're both completely different from everyone else, yet at the same time we can all identify with you in so many ways. It is one of the ways so many people use their own blogs - to vent their personal frustrations, clarify their personal struggles, and yet realize that so many others are fighting the same. Therefore there are others to identify with, to discuss with, etc. - even as we each have to still face our own demons. That doesn't make it pointless, but rather the complete reverse - helping both yourself and us and others see that they're not the "only ones", giving all a place to talk and discuss and share and understand and think.
I'm not even sure what I'm saying anymore; I held off commenting last night until I could think through what I wanted to say more clearly... and clearly, that still didn't help. :) Ah well - hopefully it made some sense!
'Twas a great post and insight into you... and into ourselves.
Lvnsm27--
Muchas gracias, and I hope so too...
Bas--
Yups. It's funny how we're all so alike, but yet such different people...
Scraps--
...wise words...you're sure you don't want to go back up on that pedestal?
:-)
Madd--
i think the ability to finally express and share in a "safe" forum is intoxicating to a large extent. Oh, I so feel what you mean...
And it fascinates me that so many of us interact on a daily basis with those just like us--who need support, understanding, empathy, emotional intensity companions--and we never know it, because none of us are willing to share it unless we're sure...
It's good to have a forum for that.
B4S--
I think we all try to sublimate our feelings that we're "not allowed to express" but each of us do it in our own way. Good for you that you found a way that works for you
Ezzie--
So there's no help for me in my obsessiveness?! :-P
You're saying that basically a blog's purpose is to connect us all and help us realize that we're not alone, and to provide a forum where we can discuss and get advice?
Sounds good...I think that makes sense... :-)
Yes dear, I'm very sure. No pedestals for me.
:P Well, no help from ME on that one, anyway!
and LOL. Not the only purpose, but a useful one... :)
So what's the purpose then? Or your purpose, at least?
Good question. I wish I knew...
I like discussion, I like pointing out good things to others that I think they might enjoy, and I like writing my own thoughts. It seems I do more of the middle one than the others at this point because I'm busy, but when I get the chance I like to do the former and latter.
As for people in general? I think you said it best in the post - it varies.
Many of the above comments already include my thoughts, so I'll try not to be repetitive.
Blogging is safe place to share your thoughts and feelings. It's your blog - so feel free. It doesn't look like you've turned anyone off with your post - so happy blogging!
Many people, including myself, can identify with your feelings on various levels.
BH, I am eternally greatful that I have where to vent, express my real self etc. and so my blog is mainly for enjoyment.
I like your style, and so I guess I'll be visiting...
Ezzie--
I hear ya...Except discussions are a bit awkward in the back and forth of a comments section...isn't there a better way?
Peace--
For sure! Come again anytime :-)
You can always email me...
and of course, come for Shabbos. :)
Post a Comment